Hoarding, the new unacceptable..

In this world of posting our private lives via blogs, and reality shows that show the worst things in life, like addiction issues, prostitution, police reality shows.. we CAN see things in others lives' that we would have seen 20 years ago.
I am very opinionated.. however, because I KNOW it, I can refrain from hurting people with it, because before the comment can leave my mouth, I already have thoughts of "Wow, that was mean" and "I don't know the whole story" chasing those opinions into a more manageable process. However, I think very few people are learning to introspect their OWN behavior to that extent, and I won't lie, I personally believe that if more people DID do it, this world would be an amazingly different place.
I got a real check again on that one by watching the new TLC show "Hoarders-Buried Alive". Now, will I watch the whole season? No, because it's really hard on me to see people so devestated, and so hurting, and not be able to help.. and I think it's because of that, that I am blogging this morning..
Someone I love very, very much, is a hoarder. And it's really hard to see the damage it does to that person's life, and social life, and relationships. So, I admit, going INTO watching this, I have a different perspective than may people, so, it is.. what it is.
I have to say though, I wanted to punch this one woman on the tv episode, the very first one, in the MOUTH! A gentleman, named Chris, is a hoarder. Now.. when the show started, his girlfriend of over a year, referred to him as " a beautiful person" who would do anything for her.. her name is Annie. Now.. as the show progressed, this man, who'd not let ANYONE into his home in two years, allowed this woman into his home. He opened his heart, and put EVERYTHING out there for her... and she was incredibly CRUEL.
I was HORRIFIED. I hope to God that she sees herself on the show, and realizes how cruel, little, and just BITCHY, she sounds. Is it easy to live with someone who hoards? No. It is HARDER THAN HELL. BUT... it's a mental illness. This woman, walked into his home.. and started "Oh my god, Chris. Chris, I can't believe this! Chris, this is CRAZY! Only CRAZY people live like this, Chris!" Now.. not only were her words the cruelest POSSIBLE words she could have used, the repeated use of his name? It tells me he DEFINETELY dodged a HUGE bullet with that one. That she could be so cruel, so judgemental, and so nasty.. and still have said "I love him"???? Seriously? If that is love, I don't want to see what she considers hate. This man put every vulnerability he had out for her to see, and she absolutely STOMPED them, and him, into the ground. Luckily for HIM, she broke up with him. My heart broke for him. It's hard to deal with, but if someone loves you, they LOVE you. They don't say things designed to harm you, or make you feel less than you should... that told me that SHE had a huge problem too. So, in case Chris should ever see these words, I want him to know, I give him TOTAL credit for being so brave, so open, and loving HER enough, to be fair to her, to share with her, and trust her... even though she did NOT deserve it.
Annie, if YOU ever read this.. I want you to know.. I pray for you tonight. That you can find love and caring and COMPASSION in yourself. Because without it, you do more damage in this life than good.. and who wants to leave that legacy?
For ANYONE reading this.. remember, life is not fair. Just because you see some aspect does NOT mean you understand, or have the right to judge. You don't know what horrid things happened to someone that they have so little ability to leave themselves vulnerable.. THAT is what causes hoarding. Not lazyiness, not greed, not apathy... it's fear, compulsion, and because it's just now becoming a studied problem, these people have NEVER had support. They need to hear "I love you, and I will love you as I help you get through this." They do NOT need to hear that you have so little self-respect that you need to tear them apart to appease the nasty little person living in your soul.... Annie's a great example of what NOT to be. And remember.. karma works... passing so heavy judgment on people has a scary way of finding it's way back to you, and you find yourself in a place you condemned.. remember that. It's MUCH easier to lift others up, than to put them down.. because when you put them up there, and you help them... they in turn lift YOU when you need it, and I PROMISE.. We ALL need it sometimes..
Chris, I hope you can find your way to a place of confidence, acceptance, and a woman who TRULY loves you for the special person you are. Annie, I hope karma is not as cruel in your lessons as she could be.. but I'll trust HER judgment, because she is the ONLY one who has that right..

**For those who may wonder.. I am pagan, and I believe that there are many deities out there.. for me, Karma is one, and since she can be a bitch.. she's a total SHE. Sorry if anyone takes offense, but hey, that's what they gave the internet back buttons for.
Sleep well, love hard, life fully, and judge not..